June 30, 2007

Overcoming Fear (Part 4): Letting Go of Fear

3...2...1. The band begins playing. The lights are shining on me, and I finally get lost in the music and the moment. It's almost an out of body experience as I open my mouth and lyrical sounds begin to eminate. Within the first 30 seconds my fear subsides, and I become a performer once more. Al looks at me and smiles.

Music has a wonderfully cathartic effect on me, and certainly helped me overcome my fear of failure. Depending on your interests you may find that there are specific triggers that help allay your fears. I have a friend who finds that brushing his teeth calms him. Okay, whatever works. However, we don't need any external stimuli to overcome our fears. Assuming you've worked on understanding and acknowledging your fear, all you need is a little mental focus, and you can let go of the fear.

Once you've accepted your fear as we discussed in Part 3, you're ready to let the fear go. Here's how:

  1. Focus on the Fear - Concentrate your mental energy on the part of your body where you feel the fear the strongest. Focus on giving that feeling all of the space and energy that it needs to live, breath, and grow...yes grow! Imagine your body expanding and try take some deep breaths to help the expansion.
  2. Showin' the Love - No, I'm not making reference to anything Barry White would sing about. Keep your attention on the most intense part of the feeling and focus on the "eye of the storm." If it helps, imagine that you're giving this target a big bear hug. The point is to break down any resistance we have to the fear. Keep this laser focus on the fear until you feel it break down and finally let go of you.

So you're probably thinking that this sounds like weird, "new-agey" stuff. Yep, I thought so, too, until I gave it a shot. It was amazing. You may find that your fear resolves completely. Then again, it may act like that attention-starved child and try to get your attention in a different way. Just keep repeating this process until you can think of the specific fearful situation that started it all, and maintain a sense of peace. Once this happens, you've reached your goal. Congratulations!

The brave man is not he who feels no fear,
For that were stupid and irrational;
But he, whose noble soul its fear subdues,
And bravely dares the danger nature shrinks from.
--Joanna Baillie

If you would like to learn more about overcoming your fears or want some help trying out this technique, consider trying a free coaching session.

Did you miss the previous chapters of the story? No worries. Read them now.

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